By Adesuwa Ewoigbokan
A modern man has to deal with the sexual media content all the time. Pictures of handsome, athletic, half naked men are shown in mainstream magazines and street billboards in every city.
Easy access to porn where every woman seems pleased by her partner in every sexual position can cause a man to feel insecure when he is entering the bedroom with his lady.
Here’s how to be more confident in bed.
Educating yourself is one of the best things you can do in order to feel more confident. Unfortunately, they don’t teach “how to please women 101” in Sex Education. “Sex education usually just covers the basics of biology,” says certified counselor, Jonathan Bennett.
Men aren’t normally taught how to please a woman; usually, that comes through experience and open communication with partners. Consequently, men with little sexual experience can feel insecure and clueless, leading to a lack of confidence.
Be realistic about a woman’s desires and wants.
Another thing that’s likely killing your confidence in bed is, focusing on what the media tells you about what ladies value when it comes to things like penis size, and the duration that sex is supposed to last. Sexual intimacy is more about quality versus longevity.
For most, “a good orgasm can take all of two minutes and 80% of women orgasm by clitoral stimulation rather than penetration.’’
Stop viewing intercourse as a performance -this is a two-person effort, if not ,one will just settle for masturbation. Stop feeling pressured to perform and if you mess it up, it’s all on you. “Guys sometimes feel anxious about sexual interactions because they think of sex as something on which they’ll be judged,” says licensed marriage and family therapist, Jill Whitney. ‘’They may think they have to act like porn stars and nothing could be further from the truth. Most porn is designed to appeal to men, what’s shown is not at all what’s appealing to most women. Porn is a lousy template for a guy who wants to be a good lover.”
Put more effort into your appearance by going to the gym; and if your closet mostly consists of ironic t-shirts and worn-out jeans, of course you’re not going to feel confident stripping down and giving it to your girl. The fastest way to boost your confidence is building it from the outside to inside.
There’s no better aphrodisiac than feeling like you look good, so give yourself that gift. You’re going to feel really good about your body when you’ve lost the weight or gotten fit, and that’s going to make you less self conscious in bed.
In addition to working out, show the rest of your body some love, by getting yourself some great grooming products. You will feel good about yourself, and this will increase your confidence in bed and out of bed.
Losing some weight and buying some new clothes really cannot hurt. So, treat sex as a regular activity. No need to start acting differently, intercourse is a normal act that people do indulge in, like eating, laughing, or sleeping. See it as one of your goals and make it a natural part of your relationship.
A well-maintained body is one of your most reliable assets when it comes to sex.
On a final note, learn what she likes and become the best lover she has ever had. If a woman is naked with you in bed, what other proof of your attractiveness and manhood do you need?
Stop over thinking and have fun!
Soro Soke !
