By Adesuwa Ewoigbokhan
Here are some gains of phone sex:
- Access to sex and intimacy: Partners who find it quite difficult to form sexual relationships with others may engage in paid phone sex, or other types of paid sex, as an alternative (not advisable).
- Promotes sexual communication: It provides a sense of safety and comfort, improves verbal intimacy, and encourages couples to be vulnerable enough to communicate more clearly about their desires and fantasies without the pressure of in-person interactions, as some may feel more comfortable talking about sex over the phone than in person.
- It serves as an ice-breaker: Lowers inhibitions thereby reducing the anxiety of face-to-face interactions since it can help a shy partner feel more assertive and confident.
*Allows for imagination and exploration: Without physical cues, spouses can rely on imagination and storytelling, a safe way to explore new sexual fantasies/role playing scenarios. Heighten arousal, creating powerful erotic experiences without a physical presence.
Phone sex can be a convenient and accessible way to stay connected with others especially for those with busy schedules or mobility issues.
Despite the benefits, it also has its disadvantages:
Lack of non-verbal cues, such as body language and facial expressions can lead to misunderstanding, and can create a sense of dependency on the relationship if partners become too reliant on phone-based communication.
Privacy concerns: There is a danger that one partner is likely to share pictures and voicemail, text, or video messages without the sender’s consent.
Sexual coercion: A spouse may hear things he or she does not want to listen to, or feel pressured into having phone sex.
Criminal Issues: Phone sex and other forms of remote sex may be illegal in some situations; for example, minors may face child pornography charges for sending sexual images, even when it’s consensual.
Catfishing: This is when a lover pretends to be someone else online and ends up indulging in phone sex with an unexpected identity, or with someone who intends to share the conversation with others.
Potential for conflicts: Cell phones are often seen as a private domain and can lead to issues of trust, like demanding passwords or seeing messages can be linked to existing relationship problems.
Furthermore, it can also be vulnerable to distractions, interruptions, and technology issues, which can disrupt the flow of communication and intimacy.
Phone sexual intimacy is best for individuals who value deep, meaningful relationships and are comfortable with technology-based communication.