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Sex: Lights on or off?

Wellness Tips For Men

 

continued from previous week

Body positivity can be promoted: for some spouses the idea of being fully naked under a bright light can be a bit scary. Putting the lights on while getting intimate might initially seem incredibly intimidating if you are not sexually confident about your body. One percent of the Boost survey respondents said they felt less self-conscious in the dark. Despite the fact that you may have some hang ups about undressing without the lights off, the chances are that your significant other will deeply appreciate the preview or full show. It might surprise you that they won’t focus on the so-called ‘flaws’ you perceive your body to have. It’s a pity we rarely see ourselves as admiringly as others do.

 

Happy couple lying in bed together

*Helps you admire the sight of your partner and vice versa: It is a well known fact that men are  visual creatures when it comes to getting carnal. Many ladies also like to feast their eyes on their partners’ bodies in the bedroom. Of those surveyed who said they liked lights-on during liaisons, a quarter reported that it made things feel more exciting. 

*Light adds colour to create enabling atmosphere.

“‘Chromo therapy’ is the art of using colour to create or enhance particular physical and emotional sensations – and using different hue of bulbs are a brilliant way of bringing it into the boudoir. Red light is said to boost desire and energy, while a blue bulb can be calming, encouraging relaxation and sensuality. Angling lights to cast sensual shadows on the walls and watching your silhouettes play together can be intensely erotic. It is also a good beginner’s introduction to observing yourself having sex if using mirrors seems too nerve-wracking.”

*With the lights on, you are sure of staying awake after a long stressful day at work, making love is what most people do. “Switch the light out, and you’re more likely to pass out, without having gotten round to sharing a close moment together – and if this happens repeatedly over time, it can lead to resentment, dissatisfaction or sexual stagnation. Keeping the lights on can give you that extra burst of energy you need. And then afterwards, you’ll sleep deeper than an all-bass choir transported to the bottom of the ocean in a submarine whilst discussing philosophy. Deep.”

*There is a level of mystery to having sex in the dark. It can create instant seduction, sultry mood, can be hot and physically flattering for everyone involved, thereby giving couples a heightened sense of confidence. Whereas,  shying away from the light can mean cheating yourself and your spouse out of a mind-blowing sack session. 

“It’s a myth that only men are visually oriented during sex,”  says New York City sex therapist, Ian Kerner, Ph.D. and author of She Comes First. If you can’t see your partner, you’re missing out on a huge aspect of sensory stimulation, he says.

“With lights on, you expose yourself more to your partner and create the opportunity to generate even greater trust, and get to know one another even better,” says Dana Weiser, Ph.D., an assistant professor of human development and family studies at Texas Tech University. It can be incredibly sexy, she adds, because you get to make eye contact and see your partner’s reactions to the pleasure you’re giving them.

Hesitating about lighting it up in the bedroom, try easing into it by flipping the switch after foreplay, says Kerner. “As you get more aroused, your inhibitions are lower and you might be more open to letting in some light,” he says.

It is cool, do it any time whereas the tough thing about only doing it in the dark is quite limiting, and you are aware it is fun to get down any moment you feel the mood is right. Having the lights on or doing it in daylight opens up a little different world of new sexy times of locations to explore.

*With the lights on, you are sure of him not accidently putting  It In your butt since that is not our idea of a fun surprise. For those that are into exercise, this is the time to show off the fruits of your gym labour. Your butt looks good in those yoga pants, it’s definitely going to look even better out of them. 

*It’s Basically Free Porn: Lights off sex are nice, but you can’t watch yourself do it in pitch black. This will give you the chance to know whether your guy is a squinter or a jaw-dropper plus the fact that you will like to witness the very moment when he climaxes.  The same is  applicable to your guy seeing your achieving orgasm too.

*You Avoid Sex Injuries:This is especially helpful after a night of drinking. No one wants to make a post-coital trip to the hospital.

Ensure to always keep your line of communication open as you get to work together to boost the physical intimacy in your relationship. Constantly check with each other where you are in your sex life. Continue to compromise with one another by maintaining a generous spirit, as you give and take on both sides.

Be open and honest with each of your sexual desires. Gladly enjoy the journey and you can always seek a professional to help deconstruct limiting or unhealthy beliefs about intercourse in marriage. Don’t forget that the investment you put in your marital health and intimacy, are worth every bit of your time and effort. You will definitely reap the benefits for the rest of your lives.

Make tonight a show time by making out with the lights on.

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