By Josephine Agbonkhese From family storytelling to speaking indigenous languages, some of the customs that once defined everyday Nigerian life are quietly disappearing. There was a time when a child did not need a smartphone to be entertained. All they needed was an adult with a good story, a compound full of cousins, or an elderly neighbour willing to share a proverb. Evenings were different then. Children could sit around their parents and grandparents and listen to stories they had heard countless times but still wanted to hear again. There were tales of clever tortoises, wicked kings, brave hunters and consequences for disobedience. Between the laughter and suspense were lessons about honesty, courage, respect and kindness. Today, many Nigerian children are more likely to hear a bedtime story from YouTube than from their parents or grandma. And that is just one example of how some of the traditions that once shaped everyday Nigerian life are gradually disappearing. When greetings meant something In many Nigerian homes, greeting an elder was not optional. Children were taught to greet everyone properly, sometimes kneeling, bowing or prostrating depending on their culture and family tradition. A greeting was more than saying “hello”. It was an acknowledgement of age, presence and relationship. Even the simple act of asking an older person how they slept or how their day went demonstrated courtesy. Today, greetings still matter, but the ritual surrounding them is changing. A hurried “Good morning” while staring at a phone can hardly compare with the deliberate greetings of previous generations. For Lagos-based teacher and mother, Funmi Adeyemi, the change is noticeable. “Children today are not necessarily rude, but the way they show respect has changed. When I was growing up, you could not walk past an elderly person without greeting properly. Parents made sure you learnt it. Those little things taught children to recognise and respect people older than them.” The mother tongue is getting quieter Nigeria’s linguistic diversity is one of its greatest cultural treasures. Yet, in many homes, indigenous languages are increasingly taking a back seat. Some parents speak English to their children because they believe it gives them an advantage academically or professionally. Others simply find it easier because English has become the language of everyday communication. The consequence is that some children can understand their parents’ mother tongue but cannot speak it confidently. In another generation, even that understanding could disappear. “A language is more than words. It carries history, humour, identity, proverbs and memories. When a language disappears from a family, a small part of that family’s cultural inheritance can disappear with it,” a Professor of Linguistics at the Lagos State University, LASU, who preferred anonymity, explained. For Chinedu Okafor, a young professional who grew up in Lagos, the loss is personal. “I understand my parents’ language, but I am not as fluent as they are. That is something I wish had been handled differently when I was younger. English was emphasised so much that speaking the indigenous language sometimes felt less important. Now I realise that there are expressions and jokes in the language that cannot be translated properly.” The disappearing art of storytelling Before television became a fixture in Nigerian homes, storytelling was entertainment, education and family bonding rolled into one. Grandparents and older relatives were living libraries. They knew family histories, traditional songs, folktales and proverbs. Children learnt about their roots simply by listening. Today, there is still storytelling, but much of it happens through screens. Social media has made it easier to consume stories, but not necessarily to preserve the personal stories of families. Perhaps there is a need to ask older relatives more questions while there is still an opportunity. Who were the grandparents? Where did the family come from? What was life like when they were young? These are stories that no internet search can fully replace. Mrs. Grace Nwosu, a retired civil servant, remembers storytelling as one of the simplest pleasures of childhood. “There was always somebody telling a story. After dinner, children gathered around and listened. Even when the story was familiar, everybody wanted to hear it again. The stories taught children how to behave, how to think and how to understand life. Today, children have so much entertainment, but they may not be getting those lessons in the same way.” ...
