By Dr. Gbonjubola Abiri

“Life without emotion is like an engine without fuel” – Mary Astor. The Oxford dictionary defines an emotion as ‘a strong feeling that results from one’s mood, feelings or relationship with others’.

When people talk about emotions, they often describe them as something to avoid, to pretend about or to dismiss especially when they are not in tune with their expectations. They often say things like: ”I have no emotions’’, ‘‘I avoid my difficult emotions’’, ‘’You are too emotional’’, or ‘‘Why are you so sensitive?’’.What has happened over time is that many of us are not taught about emotions and their functions. Messages from family, friends, partners, co-workers and even the media reinforce the stereotypes of ‘’Men don’t cry’’, “Shake it off”, “Stay positive” making us believe that emotions are bad, weak or unnecessary. Unknown to many, one of the most powerful tools for maintaining optimal mental health is to be in tune with, accept, understand and learn to regulate our emotions in a way that supports our health and wellbeing.

Embracing our emotions is necessary as when we are successfully able to do this, we are able to enjoy good quality of life, develop resilience, build relationships and make proper decisions. Our emotions are like messengers and they function to prepare us for action, communicate to ourselves and others about what we may be feeling.

To be able to get in touch with your emotions, I recommend that you do the following:- Be informed and aware about emotions in yourself and others- Check in with yourself asking “What am I feeling right now?”- Expand your emotional vocabulary as you use more specific words beyond ‘good’ or ‘bad’ like contentment, disdain, excited, overwhelmed or peaceful.- Name your emotion as this helps activate the brain’s rational processing centers and reduces the emotions hold over you.- Keep a mood journal to identify your triggers and track your emotions to increase self-awareness.- Don’t judge your emotions as they are not moral, they are messengers and should be observed with curiosity.- Be in tune with your body as you identify where you feel what emotion.

This helps give us emotional cues.- Learn to talk about it with someone you can trust to help process them.Getting in touch with your emotions is not weakness, it is indeed strength. It will allow you become more self-aware, conscious, more connected and able to cater to yourself and the world around you. Remember there is no health without mental health.