By Tinuola Agbabiaka

 

1. THE EVADER- claims not to believe in love…He won’t love you or even try to…..remember, he already told you upfront that he doesn’t believe in love…..Love is a verb….a doing word…All he is saying is that you should have no expectations from him….he won’t do anything for you,…he won’t even bother…..Run

2. THE PHYSICAL ABUSER- hits you physically and claims you made him do it……..you caused it……you should have kept quiet when he said so…….he won’t do it again…….run, run, run….as far as your legs can take you?

 

3. THE BORROWER- always broke and loans money from you…which he never pays back of course……….he is always “on the verge of a breakthrough”…….just about to hit it big……all he needs is your money and continued support……tells you “you are doing this for us”…….a major sign of financial abuse and emotional manipulation…….don’t stay there…..Run!

 

4. THE MANIPULATOR- wants you pregnant before marriage to “prove” your ability to have babies at a particular age…..and how do you get pregnant without engaging in sexual activity?………tells you everyone is doing it and you will be a fool not to…….Run

 

5. THE OPPRESSOR- concerned only by what suits and pleases him…… Your needs and opinions don’t matter…….may inform you he really likes food and enjoys different freshly made meals……he doesn’t eat frozen food….everything has to be fresh from the market and cooked daily…….Run

 

6. THE EGOIST- believes that a woman should be seen and not heard….a traditional in thoughts and deeds……..lets you know that he doesn’t believe in a working woman and a woman’s place is in the kitchen. Living room and the “other” room…..Run

 

7. THE CRITIC- you can never please him nor do anything good in his opinion…..lets you know you are always coming short of his standard………never compliments you…….never sees anything good or admirable on you…..you find yourself always striving to meet his expectations that you never seem to achieve….a sign of emotional abuse….an attempt at lowering your sense of self worth/esteem……Run

 

8. THE LIAR- Lying comes naturally to him……its second nature……he swears he is telling the truth until he is caught in a lie…….then he claims he lies because he is afraid of the consequences of telling the truth……he promises not to do it again……Run

 

9. THE SADIST- derives joy in hurting you and making you cry…….can never use the word sorry or tender an apology……believes you put yourself in a position of unhappiness…..Run

 

10. THE EMOTIONAL ABUSER – to the outside world, he is a gem……but you know otherwise….you know the truth…….even you are unable to understand or comprehend the change in character…sometimes you think it’s all in your head…..maybe you are overreacting you think…..but you KNOW you are going crazy……you can tell because it may sound trivial and not a big deal…….you are afraid to tell because no one will believe you……Run