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Home›Happiness›Is it okay for a lady to masturbate when the husband is not satisfying her in bed?

Is it okay for a lady to masturbate when the husband is not satisfying her in bed?

July 26,2021
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DearAdesuwa,

Is it okay for a lady to masturbate when the husband is not satisfying her in bed? 

Olori, Lagos.

Dear Olori,

Masturbating makes you enjoy love making because it helps you to know what you desire/want in bed. It is one of the surest ways some ladies actually experience orgasm as many men don’t the needs of their wives. As such, some women spend their entire married lives not knowing what orgasm is. This is where masturbation comes in handy.

Dear Adesuwa,

Please kindly advise: condom or skin-skin. Which is preferable? 

Efe, Warri.

Dear Efe,

To a very large extent, condom can really help you last longer in bed- preventing unwanted pregnancies and sexually transmitted diseases such as gonorrhea, Chlamydia, syphilis which are spread through body fluids. However, nothing can replace that natural feeling of warmth, wetness, closeness of having skin to skin sex. It is your choice to make.

Dear Adesuwa,

Why is second round of sex always longer than the first one? 

Ifeanyi, Abia.

Dear Ifeanyi,

First round of usually sex comes with so much energy, eagerness to score goals while the second round is with less stress. Some couples actually rest for a few minutes before entering the second round.

Dear Adesuwa,

Why is it that many married women are tired of sex after child bearing? They deny their husband sex habitually, why? 

Babajide, Lagos.

Dear Babajide,

Oftentimes, ladies feel overwhelmed by the love they feel for their newborn and it’s completely normal. It takes nine months to go through pregnancy and as such, they may need time to get their bodies back to normal. You can always indulge in other sexual activities while waiting for her to come around.

Dear Adesuwa,

I usually feel pain whenever he’s doing it from the back and it’s like his manhood is touching my womb. Please what’s the cause? 

Temitope, Auchi.

Dear Temitope,

Sex is meant to be fun, playful and it is not supposed to be painful. Pain is not normal and can often act as a signal that something is wrong. Anytime you experience pain during sex, you need to hit the brakes.

As far as sex positions go, Doggy style can definitely be considered one of the hottest and feels amazing if done right. What you are experiencing is likely the result of your well endowed spouses’ manhood hitting your cervix which can be painful. Unfortunately, it’s also a common occurrence during doggy style.

Next time, try lying down on your stomach, with a pillow underneath your pelvis, your legs close together and have him enter you from behind. Your closed legs and the elevated rear, will help you control the depth of penetration while also providing a nice, tight entry for him and a tight feel for you too.

Dear Adesuwa,

Kindly help to clarify what is normal sex and what can happen if l have sex on a regular basis? 

Sarah, Kogi.

Dear Sarah,

Normal sex is whatever feels fulfilling for you and your spouse. Communication plays a key role in making sure both parties feel sexually fulfilled.

Regular sex not only makes you feel way better in bed, it also improves your muscles and bones, keeps your heart against heart diseases, and can also determine a woman’s body smell and glow.

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