The longer couples are in marriage, the more easily they tend to slip into traditional gender roles of ruffling the bedsheets. It was not always like this at the early stages.

Years down the line, some couples actually struggle to keep their sex lives hot, passionate and fulfilling.  “Our culture, at large, tells us that it’s okay for men to be aggressive and for women to be passive. Add a layer of fatigue and it becomes the recipe for traditional sex roles to surface. It takes energy and effort to switch things up, and those resources now go to other parts of life like the kids and bills.”

Despite struggling to redefine ourselves as women, there’s a big possibility of improving your sex life, and balancing your need including that of your spouse. This is one fun that’s doable and the beauty of it all is that, it gives your sex life a loving tender care ‘TLC’ that strengthens your relationship both inside and outside of the other room.

One would want to believe that the time ladies spent at home would make them crazy for sex, especially when there’s nothing to do other than being cooped up at home with our spouses, the children and watching Netflix which actually should be a nightly activity, loading and unloading the dishwasher all day long, taking calls with a baby on your lap and doing it all over again the following day.

When exhausted, intercourse becomes the last thing on your mind by the time the children finally retire for the night. No need to throw in the towel on a hot sex life; instead, kick-start with the following tips to keep things spicy in the bedroom.

Communication is very vital – whether it is gentle touch, coming on too strongly, or using a little-too-much tongue, your man won’t know if he is meeting your sexual needs unless you tell him. Two of you can actually explore your body to find new erotic spots that turns you both on, for a sense of discovery that you both will enjoy.

Foreplay – Be creative; foreplay is more than just a precursor to sex, so try something new, such as, an oil massage or playing a fun game to get the body excited as intercourse is just as much of a mental act as it is physical.

The last thing you want in your sex life is too much routine. To avoid this, you simply have to get out of the bedroom. Make use of any other room; it can be the bathroom, kitchen, library, empty visitors room, staircase and all those high school make-out memories. There are a number of options to get it on, never limit sex to just bedroom affair.

Schedule sex – This may seem weird but, there’s actually nothing wrong in scheduling sex. It’s a great way to encourage busy couples to have sex regardless of how tired you may be at the end of the night. Mark it on your shared calendar, or choose specific days during the week and you will wake up in the morning knowing you will be getting sexy later. Remind your spouse after scheduling a day, this is not about forgetting the date but, to create sexual tension even further by texting them the morning of it, or talking about it over breakfast (in code, obviously). This builds anticipation and allows you both to get excited for love making.

Quickies – Can be fun- Intercourse should not always be done on the bed with lit candles and rose petals. Sex can be just as exciting when it’s out of the blue/spot of the moment/spontaneous. Move to having sex in the morning instead of at night. It doesn’t have to go hours to be fun for both of you. It can act as one for the road thing.

TO BE CONTINUED…