Naturally, when you’re aroused or copulating, your brain and body lighten up like a pinball machine going through a multitude of physiological changes to make sex as enjoyable as possible.

Your the way you feel and respond during sex, known as the sexual response cycle are categorized into four phases; spanning from the moment you get in the mood; mentally/physically, to the blissful tapped out close of events.

STATE 1: Desire/Excitement
As you get excited, your heart beats speed up and your breathing gets heavier. Your skin flushes ins areas like your chest and back- this is fittingly called sex flush. More blood flows to various parts of your body including your genitals. The clitoris swells and dilates (the purpose of the dilation is theoretically, to make it easier for the penis to penetrate). Manhood gets erect, nipples harden, vagina may get wet, and muscles throughout your body tense up, boosting sexual tension.

STATE 2: Plateau
The changes in your body intensify. Breathing, heartbeat, and blood pressure rise. Muscle tension increases even more. The vagina swells and its walls turn a darker colour. The clitoris becomes super-sensitive to touch while the testicles pull upward.

STATE 3: Orgasm. Sexual excitement reaches its peak. You feel a series of intense muscle contractions as your body releases the tension. The muscles of the vagina and uterus contract, while muscles at the base of the penis tighten and releases semen and ejaculates.

STATE 4: Resolution
Now, spent of your pent-up energy, your body returns to its pre-sex state. Breathing calms. Muscles relax. The penis and vagina return to their original size and colour. You may feel calm, satisfied, or tired out.
This four-phase cycle is a fairly simple way to describe the human sexual response. In reality, the way we respond to sex doesn’t always fit neatly into four ordered boxes. “One thing coming before another is pretty inaccurate to the human sexual experience.”
For one thing, not every sex act leads to orgasms. Some people have sex without feeling any excitement. Others have multiple orgasms in a row, and they don’t reach resolution. Each part of the cycle doesn’t have to happen in any special order since desire can come late in the ACT.
Orgasm isn’t the only reward for having sex. You can do it for lots of other reasons- For instance, to increase intimacy or make your partner happy. “Just because someone doesn’t have an orgasm doesn’t mean they aren’t feeling some level of satisfaction.’’
It’s very likely that, if you’ve desired someone for a long time, the arousal phase might be faster when you finally get laid. Early in a relationship, when the person you’re dating is new to you, desire can come before arousal and if you’ve been together for many years, there’s tendency you may get excited before feeling desire.
See your doctor if you are unhappy with your sex life, it could be a treatable medical problem; like vaginal dryness or erectile dysfunction. Some types of medications can also hamper desire, changing the dose or switching prescriptions might help. And if it isn’t physical, your doctor can refer you to a sex therapist to help you work through any emotional, relationship or psychological issues that are affecting your sexual life. The therapist can teach you and your partner ways to manage problems like, lack of desire or trouble reaching orgasm.
It also helps, to get to know your body’s sexual response cycle. Learning about your own response will make you have more fulfilling experiences.